Jimmy Fallon’s Audience Admit Why They’re Still #Single!By Abigail T
Are you tired of the dating game? Have you been swiping left and right for a little too long with less than satisfactory results? Are there times when you just feel like giving up because the right person has not yet come along? Well, join the club. There are people all over the Internet who are still single, and they all shared the reasons why in response to Jimmy Fallon’s #Hashtags challenge. For the show’s long-running segment, Jimmy called out to his followers on Twitter to tweet him the reasons why they’re still single with the hashtag #WhyImSingle. The responses blew up online. If you’re looking to feel a little less alone, read on to see some single folks share their stories.
Disclaimer: photos are for illustrative purposes only. Photos and the users who posted them are not to be associated in any way with the Tweets and Twitter users discussed in the article.
Just me and my dog
Twitter user @nicolenotshakes is definitely committed. This level of dedication and commitment should warrant some attraction, but according to her, it’s the reason why she’s still single. Maybe it’s because she’s too extra with her dog, but we’d like to disagree.
Honestly, who needs a guy when you can wear matching PJ’s with your dog? The photos will definitely garner more Instagram engagement than a regular picture of you wearing matching PJ’s with your significant other. We rate this human-pet relationship.
Some people have dealbreakers that can stop a date before it’s barely begun. For example, they require their potential partner to listen to the same music they do. Or, they only date people of the same faith. For @JesseWorsty, the relationship hangs on whether or not the other person likes dogs.
We don’t blame him. We understand that everything is a preference, but if you don’t like dogs, there might be something wrong with you (we mean they are all adorable, aren’t they?). Cat people and dog people always disagree, and it might potentially put a strain on the relationship. This Twitter user did what he had to do and walked away.
Food out of a hood
Popcorn is an essential movie snack, whether you’re watching a film in the cinema or you’re just chilling at home. But have you ever wished you didn’t have to hold on to the popcorn bucket for the entire film? Well, this Twitter user has just the solution for that.
Putting the popcorn in his hoodie is an ingenious idea. But we also understand why some people might be turned off by such behavior. It’s pretty childish and doesn’t make him look great. But as long as he doesn’t put the hoodie over his head after the movie, he should be fine.
Boyfriends are there because they are potential husbands, so you would want your family to like him. It’s considered an importaint milestone in a relationship when your significant other’s family begins to like you, take you in, and invite you to their family occasions.
If the siblings like you, you’re basically in the family. @_sarahansen’s sisters liked her first boyfriend so much; it seems like they pretty much wanted her to marry him. Which made it difficult for her to date other guys, and that’s why she’s still single.
Here’s more proof that family can get in the way of your developing love lives. This time, it’s not the sisters’ intervention but the 11-year old cousin. Kids sure have a lot of creative thoughts in their heads. Sometimes they’re endearing; other times, they’re just plain creepy.
You know the way children can lowkey mess with your heads? Well, this cousin definitely messed with the guy’s head because @briellenh is still single. Maybe next time you meet someone, don’t bring them to meet the extended family too soon.
Get to the punchline!
We all know people who are like this. They start telling a story, and then they break into a fit of laughter before they even get to the funny part! Sometimes it can be endearing, but too much of it can be just plain irritating.
If only this guy could get to the punchline while he still had the listener’s attention. Maybe somebody might actually think he’s funny and give him the time of day! What a shame people are missing out on this guy.
Doing you a favor
The photos you put on your dating app profile are the first things any potential bae sees. You have to make sure they’re able to hook people and make them swipe right. You should also post photos that you think make you look good and represent you best.
Whoever this woman was, she thought she was doing @concernecus a favor since apparently, his photo wasn’t. But how on earth does she have the audacity to swipe right on someone she wasn’t into, just to tell him to change his photo!
Don’t go chasing waterfalls
If you didn’t grow up in the ‘90s, then you might not understand this next tweet. The R&B group TLC released a song called Don’t Go Chasing Waterfalls in 1994, which is the entire punchline of this person’s joke.
The conversation might have stopped for two reasons. Either the guy just didn’t find the joke funny, or he didn’t understand the reference. Why are we getting the feeling he didn’t understand the reference and was too proud to ask?
A Sirius problem
It’s no question that Potterheads go hard. There is a whole generation of people who were raised on the Harry Potter books, and another group of kids who grew up watching the films. Different Harry Potter stans show their love in different ways.
It definitely is a very Sirius problem indeed when you’re bringing up magic references to mere Muggles. They just don’t get it. But when you find someone who does… that’s when you know that they’re the James to your Lily.
The wrong way
Everybody knows that there’s a right way to eat KitKats. You break apart the individual vertical pieces and eat them like that. It’s a disgrace to enjoy a KitKat any other way. Some may say this is the ultimate relationship dealbreaker.
We don’t know why this guy is holding up the piece of KitKat like he’s so proud of what he’s done. Get this atrocity out of our faces, please. There is no way anyone would even consider him! We’re definitely swiping left.
Trying too hard
If you’re pretending to enjoy things you don’t like just to have something in common with your potential bae, then you should reconsider. Love accepts people for who they are, not what they pretend to like! That’s why the age-old adage is to be yourself.
If you don’t like The Avengers, you don’t like The Avengers. No matter how much you force yourself to, you can’t be a fan. If this guy didn’t like @tanipartner1998 because she didn’t know anything about Iron Man, then maybe he wasn’t the guy for her.
They’re all the same age to me
Some people talk to babies with their googoo-gagas. They put on their baby voice and try to talk at the baby’s level. Other people who aren’t as good with kids are more awkward. They don’t know how to hold a baby, let alone talk to them.
Talking to babies like they’re adults isn’t exactly a bad thing. If anything, it’s probably good for the babies for when they start talking, in that they start forming proper words. But we’re not the experts here. If this guy says he’s still single because of it, maybe people want someone who’s good with kids!
A little too real
Girls do want someone who keeps it real, someone who is honest about their feelings. It definitely cuts out all the confusion and waiting around, which is such a big part of the dating game. But sometimes you gotta read the room and reel in the honesty a little too.
If you’re regifting something, you’re already on the wrong track. It makes us wonder if this guy even likes this girl. Why is he being so completely blatant about things? Doesn’t he want to impress her, just a little bit?
When you have a crush on someone, all common sense goes out the window. If you’ve got it bad for them, they make you lose all ability to think clearly and act in a reasonable manner: exhibit A, @GrampaBerty, and the incident with the flower.
Judging by this story, the boy probably already liked @GrampaBerty. He picked a flower for him after all. But things immediately took a turn when Bert put the flower in his mouth. A little awkward, but some people might find it endearing.
The health inspector
This tweet reminds us of that one episode of Friends, where Phoebe went on a few dates with a health inspector. At first, he seemed like a pretty nice guy. But the two quickly ran out of places to eat because every restaurant in New York apparently violated health codes!
It really is true when people say you can’t run away from your job. Sooner or later, it’s going to come back to haunt you and affect your personal life. No such thing as job and home life boundaries for this guy!
The last thing women need is for guys to go around hitting on them and then telling them they’ve been “watching” them. So if this is the kind of slip-up this guy keeps doing, it’s no wonder why he’s still single.
No matter how much potential success he was about to have with this girl, it all hit the fan when he said that follow-up statement. We’re surprised the girl didn’t get up, call the police for a restraining order, and leave right away!
Spread the love
You know when you’re too tired to respond to someone, but you feel bad if you don’t, so you go to say something, and something entirely different comes out? That’s most probably what happened to @avi_abrahamsen in the bathroom here.
Honestly, now that we’re reading this tweet thoroughly, it’s actually kind of nice that they said “I love you” instead of “thank you.” Who knows, that worker probably needed it that day. Gotta spread the love whenever you can, right?
A little sad
We understand if this is the vibe for anyone in 2020 or 2021. But seeing that this person tweeted in 2018, we have to ask – why weren’t you out brunching with your friends on a Sunday afternoon? Do you have no friends?
You didn’t have the pandemic as an excuse to not go out. So why were you at home eating leftovers and watching Channing Tatum do a striptease? No wonder you’re single – you aren’t out there meeting new people!
Know your worth
Ladies, listen! Don’t get caught up with a man who isn’t willing to spend money on you! If he’s struggling financially, be understanding. But if he’s ballin’ and he’s still scrimping on what he spends for you, it’s time to leave.
This woman knew her worth, and that’s why she left. If he wasn’t willing to spend more than $50 on an engagement ring, who’s to say how much he would be willing to spend on the wedding? The kids’ education? The house?
Everyone knows that crushes get you flustered. You’re not thinking straight, you’re messing up your words, and you’re too busy trying not to throw up because of the butterflies in your stomach… and then you end up telling the girl that they’re the problem.
“Thanks,” the girl said, smiling a little at @wawa_iki and taking his breath away. “Y…your problem,” he quickly responds, thinking he had that short encounter on lock. But then the girl looks at him weirdly. He realizes his mistake. Now all he wants to do is curl up in a ball.
The obvious is called obvious for, well, obvious reasons. There’s really no need to state or re-state things if they are already glaringly apparent for everyone. But when you’re talking to someone you find attractive, that kind of common sense abandons ship.
We would like to hope that the cute guy online didn’t abandon ship. But the fact that @Wcubed3 is even joining in on this #hashtags challenge means that guy online did, in fact, stop talking to him after that encounter.
Frankly, the common metaphor of “butterflies in your stomach” is a cliché. It gets old really quickly, and if you’re trying to woo someone, it’s probably best to think of a more creative expression. Twitter user @CClok85 knows what’s up.
Eagles in his stomach is a real compliment! It’s a silly line that’s bound to make a girl laugh. What else can you substitute for old cliches? “I love you to the last scrape of peanut butter left in the jar” instead of “to the moon and back” can be one. You’re free to use that one. You’re welcome.
Watch a show too much, and it can get in your head. Once it gets in your head, it’s going to start affecting other areas of your life. That includes your love life too. You know what you have to do now. Watch romcom shows and take notes!
Unfortunately for @BelleofBabble, the show she binges is a crime drama. We can all agree that Criminal Minds is a great show, but it can get pretty twisted. Despite the show’s morbid nature, though, trying to gauge a person’s relationship with his mother is important if the relationship were to be serious. We mean you don’t want to land up staring in TLC’s I’m in love with a mama’s boy after all.
Synonyms, am I right? Some words mean multiple things, and when you’re not particularly focused, or you’re too flustered, you can mistake those meanings. The word “type,” for example, can be a verb and a noun. And even the noun can have several meanings!
Guess whoever asked Erin this question now knows her blood type if she ever needs a transfusion. We hardly think this mistake is the sole reason why @etes_97 is still single. We’re sure there’s someone out there who would appreciate her and her O negative blood.
Still on the subject of synonyms, the names of historical events can also mean something else these days. Like the way “Civil War” doesn’t just refer to the war that took place in America in the 1860s. It’s now a Marvel movie too.
It looks like @duck_a_holic99 nerded out a little too soon. This guy must have been so confused when she went on and on about US history! “Gettysburg?” he must have thought, “are we even talking about the same movie?”
People get protective over a lot of things. Their privacy, their space, their family, their fries… yeah, you read that right. French fries. Some people just don’t share their fries with anyone else, not even with potential life partners.
It’s understandable that people wouldn’t want to share their fries. But this is the kind of behavior you can afford to pull after you get the girl or guy. If you’re still on the market, you gotta share the fries until you find someone!
Way too busy gobbling
First dates are usually about getting to know the other person. Whether you do it over dinner, drinks, or a hike, there’s usually some form of conversation going on. It’s the way you gauge whether you actually like this person or not.
It seems that no conversation went down during this particular date. If anything, the guy was left having to pay for 20 plates of meat and left without much information aside from the fact that @darthbaper really enjoys Korean barbeque.
Brunch date fail
Dates over brunch, lunch, or dinner are usually pretty casual. But it can also be daunting having to make a good impression on another person while you eat. You’re busy making sure you’re using proper table manners, all while worrying you might have something stuck in your teeth.
We are getting secondhand embarrassment from this tweet. We’re so sorry this happened to @nicodemus2019, and we wouldn’t wish this mishap on our worst enemy! We hope she at least walked away without any major injuries, although we’re guessing the major injury was to her pride.
The first kiss with someone is critical. It has to be at the perfect moment, the perfect timing. A lot rides on that initial kiss. It might even factor into whether there is going to be a second date or not.
It’s safe to say there was no second date for @RickyP3rd and this girl. If we were her, we would get up to go to the bathroom, tell him we’re just going to wash our face, leave, and never come back.
“Um, I need my pen back”
The brain sees what it wants to see. Even though the eyes merely see a hand reaching out, the brain equates that to a hand longing to be held. And so, when that’s what your brain tells you, you hold that hand.
Some of these tweets really do give off secondhand embarrassment. We can’t imagine how awkward and mortifying it must have been! She holds his hand. He reluctantly takes it and looks at her with confused eyes. “Um… I just need my pen back.” She turns red, returns the pen, and runs out of the room, stuttering some sorry excuse.
Ladies, if your independence and self-sufficiency are intimidating to a guy, stop wasting your time. You are way too badass and busy to be hanging around massaging their male ego. Go out, live your life, and keep building that career!
It’s 2021, people. Women in positions of power should not still be made to feel like they’re doing something wrong. If this social shift is too much for a guy, then you’re better off pursuing something or someone more worthwhile of your attention.
Some people may find belching or burping endearing, in which case Twitter user @thekittenb would not be single right now. But she burped right in the face of a guy who was asking her out, and he did not appreciate it.
This could have been the start of a cute love story. His best friend ditched him to hang out with other people, so he came up to Betty to see if she wanted to hang. They could have realized their feelings for each other at that time, but nope. She burped him away.
Maybe love at first sight transports you to different periods in history. That seems to be the case with @eseits’ introduction to a gorgeous woman. Instead of saying hello like a normal person, he treated her like the queen she really was.
He didn’t just call her “m’lady,” he also curtsied. Now that’s what we like to call totality. Is this the 1800’s? Are we living in the world of Bridgerton? What’s a girl gotta do to get referred to as “my lady” out here?
No street clothes on the bed
Different people have different house rules. Some houses are a shoes-off and left at the front door kind of house. Others wear slippers. Still, others wouldn’t fuss over the issue. For tweeter @ddimo123, it’s quite simple—no street clothes on her bed.
Especially in the time of the coronavirus, this actually makes a lot of sense. You don’t know where people have been and what kinds of bacteria have congregated on their clothes. Stay on the couch where all the other dirty-clothed people are.
Looks like you got your tongue in a twist there, @pancakesnails! Here’s another example of just how paralyzing it is to have a crush on someone. She meant to say the guy looked handsome, but it ended up going downhill from the second she opened her mouth.
“Hey, fancy seeing you here! Wow, you look… pretty… today,” the words tumble out of Sarah’s mouth. The guy cringes at the word she just used. “Oh, sorry!” Sarah says, realizing her mistake, “I didn’t mean pretty, I mean you’re not pretty. I mean, you are! You totally are, but like you’re not pretty, sorry. I meant ugly.”
Can’t be asked
If you think the bulk of the work comes in during the initial talking phase of a relationship, then you’re wrong. Did anyone ever warn you that you still have to put as much effort in after you start dating the guy?
Just think about it. If you’re enjoying not having to shave your legs every day right now, you should consider having to let go of that convenience. On the other hand, you also shouldn’t shave your legs to please a guy. Shave to make yourself feel good!
Most of the time, when you’re on a date, you have your guard up. All you’re trying to do is be nice and make a good first impression. Of course, you also have to find a balance between being your honest self and being respectful.
Twitter user @Sweaty__Betty was just saying what was on her mind. Unfortunately for her, doing that on dates doesn’t tend to end so well. Sure, she was being herself and being honest, but she probably should have kept her thoughts to herself until after the date when she tells her best friend about how it went.
When you’re single, you can afford to sleep however you like. If you’re a snorer, sleep talker, sleepwalker, or if you’re someone who flails around in their sleep, you don’t need to worry about bothering the person lying next to you.
But when you have a significant other, you have to try to reign it in. Yes, you’re in your subconscious in your sleep, but if you’re not careful, you might end up kicking your partner right off the bed.
Got it from my momma
We can’t imagine the awkward silence that ensued after this cringe-worthy conversation. @KatyDombroski obviously had good intentions and was trying to pay the guy a compliment, but it somehow all went wrong. She just wanted to kill two birds with one stone—tell the guy he had a great smile and that his mother must have one too. But that backfired in the worst way.
Maybe the guy’s mom was hot. I guess we’ll never know because of Katy’s inappropriate comment. And to think that they could have been something good. Lesson learned: if you’re trying to get out of singleness, think before you speak, kids.
If you’re a dog parent and you’ve never thought of putting a dog biscuit or kibble in your mouth, you’re lying. All this Twitter user was doing was satisfying every dog person’s curiosity. Can confirm: dog biscuits taste just like mini muffins.
We’re not here to judge @demaskingtape. If she wants to eat dog biscuits, then she should do whatever she wants. But we also understand why some people might think this is a little weird. Maybe people are just scared she’s going to offer them dog biscuits when they come over for dinner.
Still living with parents
At some point in everyone’s lives, there comes a time when they have to move out of their parents’ house. Be it for college or after college, or whenever else is convenient, people in the dating game expect the people they see to be relatively independent.
It’s a little disheartening, and honestly, it raises several questions, when you hear that someone over a certain age is still living with their parents. So yes, if @TrustedTexan resides in his mother’s basement, most girls would swipe left.
If someone can’t even do a simple thing properly, then it’s probably a testament to how poorly they would fare in the future. This Twitter user can’t get her quilt out of her dryer without punching herself. If this keeps happening, her future spouse needs to be warned.
In @Kschafheimer’s defense, quilts are heavy as heck! We don’t quite understand how she managed to injure herself this badly, but we’re sympathetic. We hope she finds someone who can help her get her laundry out of the dryer safely.
The societal standards that girls need always to have smoothly shaved legs have resulted in a general dislike for shaving. It’s such hard work, it takes a lot of time, and it never lasts long. So when there’s a way not to shave as much, we’ll take it.
Twitter user @NicoleAsselin1 has taken after a lot of girls around the world. When wearing ripped jeans, she only shaves the parts of her leg that are exposed. She found a literal loophole out of having to shave fully. That’s a win to us, and we don’t think that her efficiency has anything to do with her singleness.
I wanna hold your hand
Oh, @makmanwaring. How naïve of you. This guy actually really liked you, and he wanted to have a little movie moment with you! But that didn’t end up happening because of your question, which ruined the moment. What a shame. It could have been really romantic.
To be fair, though, this guy was driving through a canyon. Especially if he still drove stick, he would need both hands to drive. Maybe this tweeter was just worried about their safety. But as The Beatles sang, all the guy wanted was to hold her hand.
Aya aye Cap’n
We are loving all the flustered people on the timeline messing up otherwise ordinary encounters with their crushes and members of the opposite sex. To bring this to a close, and to make everyone feel better, here’s Jimmy Fallon’s own #WhyImSingle experience.
Of course, that one occurrence did not end up affecting his love life. However long ago that was, he is now happily married with two little girls. His wife Nancy has even appeared on his show several times when he was still shooting the show from home!